I used to think that it shouldn’t matter what other people were like – sad, angry, cynical or happy – because I should be able to not take on their feelings. Notice the ‘should’ talk there.
When colleagues would tell me how difficult their job was or how their manager was such an ass and I would feel their stress and frustration, I would struggle to not take their negative energy away with me. I would remind myself that this was the other person’s stuff and do my best to let go of it and their energy.
Now, I still believe that I need to be able to hold onto myself enough so that I am not dragged into what another person is feeling. However, there is more that needs to be considered.
I am an empathic person. I do tune into how other people are feeling whether they are expressing it or not. If I spend a lot of time with someone with negative energy, I can feel really stressed. On the other hand, spending time with those with a positive outlook feels great, boosts my enthusiasm for life and work, helps me see the possibilities, get creative and move forward.
It is so easy to get caught up with the negative – bad news on TV, gossip, the moans of colleagues, friends or family. So it is helpful to have positive people in your life that will cheer you up when you feel down, that will encourage you, that will make you laugh, that will appreciate you and show you compassion.
Also, sometimes I find that time on my own is just as positive as spending time with positive people. As long as I manage that time so that it isn’t eaten up with negative thoughts, but rather is focused on the good loving energy that comes from within me, it is a time to replenish.
Have a think about who and what in your life provides you with positive energy. How do they encourage you? Remember to nurture those relationships and let them help you restore your positive energy when it takes a hit. Also think of ways every day that will help you keep in balance. Maybe it is meditation, a walk in nature or speaking with a positive friend.
If you would like some support in managing your energy so that you keep well and can continue to provide that positive energy for other people, I would love to hear from you.